Rudi and the Crime of the Century

 Something a little different this week that goes back to what inspires this blog childhood anf also ties in little to mention else where to 1974 and Now Yearbook' 74 cos that was when this record came out.

I originally had this on a UK A&M 8 Track tape which did sound very good in the way back then cassettes didn't always and records were no use in our car.

Supertramp's second album, examines many things but one area that comes up is school where Rudi, the central character becomes increasingly isolated in class, the playground which has real playground "play" recorded and used to transport you to his world as he moves into the grown up world which he feels ill unable to understand.

It was one the first things I experienced that matched my feelings not everything was okay in our school world - Roger Walters lyrics in "The Wall" was another some five years later and I saw them perform much of this album in a BBC "Sight & Sound in Concert special.

This Mobile Fidelity Sound Labs record version came out 1979, pressed very late 1978 actually, as one of those "audiophile" issues where a regular album is cut and pressed without some of limitations that make playing on chepaer systems okay but can rob the music of the dynamics and extended bass and treble by the late Stan Ricker.

On this the music cames to life magically and moves you even more.

Thoughts around just being me

So it is another Month already as fed up as I am with all this rain and wind we've had for most of this year we are heading into the summer and on Wednesday temperatures were up to about 18 degrees c so I was able to leave off wearing a coat completely and just have a fairly plain baseball cap on as walking past school with traditional school cap would really stick out.

In the time I've just come out being ALB/ASB publically one thing I've always taken a bit of thought over are what are the limits to acceptance or at least toleration when it comes to being "on the street", walking by and into shops, passing parks and the like as for one thing most certainly from their teens upwards if anything want to be seen as a bit older than they might be or at least as their age group and while we'd all agree we're just NOT, some people have this notion anyone who looks like a child, is looking to harm one.

And in their world 2+2=5.

Recently I overheard a bit of a conversation two boys were having talking about how they felt if they'd of been the subject of it, they'd be embarressed to dress the way that person did.

Most of us can recall from our teens the various groups and sub cults our friends were into and how they went beyond things like music, literature and film tastes to dressing in a particular style from often darkly dressed goths, the punks that terrified my parents when they saw a few of my school mates outside school and New Romantics with long hair over one eye, colourful outfits and make up (and that was just the boys!).

All stood out from the conventions of t shirts, jeans or chinos and trainers most were encouraged to wear beyond school or work, often the butt of ill thought out comments and preconcieved attitudes and assumptions.

Did looking out of sync with that really phaze (pardon the odd americanism) them as they ventured forth on the street just being themselves eyond just keeping themselves safe?

Hardly.

The adjective embarrassed means "A person who is embarrassed feels shy, ashamed, or guilty about something" and most of us can think of things that we may of felt embarrassed about such as going to a store with friends and not having enough money on to pay for something or taking part in school play rehearsal only to have your trousers fall down as where they'd been taken up to fit clearly wasn't enough and you're in the spotlight with just a pair of dark tights on between you, your mates and the spotlight.

You definately wanted the ground to swallow you up after that!

Do I feel ashamed, guilty or shy about being a little adult boy?

No, because fundermentally I cannot help being very much in the mindset of someone who from a mainstream point of view hasn't grown up, who does have little in common with the interests and obessions of "grown ups" even if I know of them.

It's hardly voluntary or an act.

Does dressing more inline with that of actual boys nearly all the time leave me feeling ashamed as I walk into the corner store with my short trousers and usually turn over top socks on, catching a bus into town and the like?

The short answer is no, because I look like I am and I feel even though like actual boys I have options so when it's a weekend I may wear boys sports or casual wear as they would unless it was a more formal occassion.

I do "read the room" when it comes to passing places where children (and parents such as at dropping off times) might be enmass, not wear school uniform in the park when children would be there (and they'd not be either) because all children do attempt to do the same too as much as you are being you to both ensure no one feels akward and alarm bells are not triggered.

It's nothing to do with my own feeling ashamed at all as that still a little boy in the room, out on the streets.

I don't feel guilty for being me, it's not kink based scene or a kind of a punishment I have to endure in public nor am I causing harm.

I am being just me.

Of gardens and animals

 

The last week of this month,what?

Well contrary to what your bones may of been telling you it is actually spring as yet again it's started to rain as I type this Thursday morning after a more spring-like day before with the sun very much on your legs.

There always appeared to me a difference between the gardens we had in the three houses I allegedly grew up in and that of other boys you knew and even that of your extended family in that was there less formal planted areas with specific plants and flowers that were seasonal.

The garden shown is more like like that of my much missed grandads, an unsual for the area long rear garden in the middle of a terrace that as raised from the rear of the property it was he'd made dedicated corners that we played in.

As much as we got to anything like that were roses on side panel, planters dotted about and the pyracantha I inisisted upon having that the birds love.

The one thing I didn't do a lot of was play with dogs chiefly down to us only having a dog for an extremely short period and that relatives didn't visit with dogs much and never in the garden.

The dog playing and walking bit was exercising our science teachers dog at boarding school in all weathers from the grounds and having a pass out to a nearby field along a narrow path I was trusted with.

Although our cats did go outdoors, they were always on leads during the spring and summer as they were not semi-feral.

Pawsing for rest

It's Friday so we're back.

It's been a bit of an odd week here recovering as sadly one does from pretty severe miagraines from the weekend that at one stage I thought I'd end up missing my life long favourite program as the light from the tv screen badly affects me when I'm like that.

There was even a conincidence of sorts where  Abby, one of the three BP Presenters and wheelchair user started having issues with her left wrist which you do use turning your wheels as she was preparing for the challenge of "running" the London Marathon in a sports wheelchair adn it urned out after a MRI Scan she'd damaged it and so needed to recover.

That sadly means she can't do that challenge.

Well my left wrist was playing up with very swollen tendons that left me in excusating agony when doing things like washing up, locking up for good measure so I needed to rest hence having to take things steady online as well as in the real world.

That's how these things just pan out I'm afraid.

Great conductors: William Steinberg

After last weekends adventure, we take a look at a new box set of cds.

This week a special four compact disc set was issued.

William Steinberg was one of America's finest conductors, making recordings for Capitol-Emi,Command and RCA Victor but whose career co-incided with a drop in record label interest in recording American orchestras so were overlooked at the time.

Including 'vital and inspiring performances', this set features William Steinberg conducting the Boston Symphony Orchestra, which includes some of his 'best entries in his discography, and the finest recordings of the works'. 

Mendelssohn's own orchestration of the 'Scherzo' from his 'Octet' and Stravinsky's 'Scherzo fantastique' and 'Scherzo à la russe', coupled on CD 3 with formidable virtuoso renderings of orchestral showpieces by Dukas, Richard Strauss and Saint-Saëns, were originally prepared for release on LP LSC-3155 but remained unpublished - until now. 

All recordings in the set have been newly transferred and remastered.

After these were recorded, the orchestra signed a contract to record for DG, one of Europes leading classical labels and made a serie sof well respected performances that I do own on compact disc.

Drama

 I won't be around that much this weekend which is why things are just a little rushed as things involve a very early by my standards start and we have eaten all the eggs here, a slow process given the need to be mindful of miagraines and an intake of higher than normal sugar levels.

Looking over one site which I won't name, the attempt to assist a girl to rejoin a site was frustrating for their inability to comprehend that when a site makes itself practically invisable to all be registered, logged in members then you can't google to see how it looks and that an instruction to email the site at ----@-----.com and include some detail about you and preferred username means you cannot register via anything on site.

Is that the best way to balence keeping people clear of trolls and unwarrented attention on the one hand and get new members?

Probably not as some sites manage a overview of the forum that does't allow you to see posts on sub forums so things are kept confidential and equally while the site colour scheme isn't disablity friendly for having small text and white backrounds, there's nothing I can do about that.

Just somebody decided to make the layout appear uber pretty rather than accessible to all in the way one music site at least allows me to change text backrground colour and size to make it easy for me to read.

They were just getting snarkier and snarkier so when they said it had been settled for them, I just left them pretty much with it.

I like to be friendly, I'm that kind of a boy but I really don't need that grief any more than those who don't see past reminsciences as being a part of the regressive experience even if you don't just want to see only that on a site.

Good Friday edition

 Gawd almighty, does it ever stop raining here?

Yes, the rain rather woke me up this morning so I'll need to get a nap in later on I guess but we are entering Easter which for me at least does bring back memories of things like making easter bonnets and cards.

For reasons best known to them in charge we didn't do Easter Egg hunts when armed with a set of clues you run around like a maniac trying to hind said eggs hiding, in, under or over things and you get to keep them!

There is a box of chocolates from my Aunt here I can chomp through and a couple of eggs although being me I do have to be mindful that dark chocolate is a maigraine trigger having had sadly some bad childhood memories of eating them and being out of commission for a few days.

Happy Easter