Although I have always been like this for a long time tm, the year 2018 has seen me grow more and in one respect this image kind of summarizes it perfectly because you have the interest in the outside world as in current affairs, pop culture, arts and sport that I have reading a newspaper, reading say the BBC website that shows some maturity and equally there is the more child-like side that clearly is a boy still and enjoys doing those clearly non adult centred things.
Thus I am "adult" by age and some comprehensions of the world and yet in others very much the child.
The Chris of 2018 wore shorts nearly all the time and schoolboy longs when not in what was clearly a schoolboy uniform right down to the jersey and long socks in public, in front of my parents, siblings and at home at Christmas even to the point of playing with his lego on boxing day.
Indeed I spent nearly all this winter outside in them with temperatures down to five degrees C with just a decent coat on being more resilient than ever being free from any seasonal ailments.
That boy is just how I see and am presenting from now on - very much a boy with no compromises - and being open about it.
The other thing is my sense of innate masculinity is much stronger than it has been for a number of years part of which has come by looking anew at just how I was as that boy looking at what did and enjoyed as it talking both on tumblr and here about that.
I saw a very clear indication to where I gravitate to when it comes to gender based roles and positions and how the trickle of doubts and slights had been pushed by others with their own often anti-men (and boy) agendas.
It is very clear I am very much masculine at the core the odd gender minority interest interest aside and acting from that inner sense has helped me so much this year to the point I am standing up for my gender and nay even showing pride in my boyishness.
Part of the exploration of self has taken the form of adopting the values and principals in scouting which was a denied part of boyhood, learning new skills and challenging myself to help me grown more as that adult-but child boy making the most of my abilities which outside of my actual disabilities I have and would benefit from engaging more with.
I am becoming a cub scout in spirit, learning from it and moving on as I learn life skills and engaging more with nature, taking long walks paying attention to my environment.
The year saw my involvement on Tumblr where I interacted with a number of you, saw ASB.org temporarily surface before closing and finds Tumblr itself in a state of some confusion presently.
While I have a blog like this one, because of what is going on at Tumblr I have decided to back up The Traditional Schoolboy and TSB2 to Wordpress lest any posts with personal insights get deleted or whole tumblrs go.
Losing a straight reblog of an image isn't a disaster as I tend to save images I use but it's anything with my text in that's more of a problem potentially.
I established a tumblr looking at Scouting last month and have put that manually onto a Blogger account lest anything happen as that'll be less busy but more personal in feel look at that and what its values mean to me. I have put a link to it on the Page tabs that will take you straight to it.
I also established the Uniform Regressors site Uniformed Regression Forum which is a sfw spot to discuss age regression and uniform topics free from any sex or spanking content because it is rare for any discussion to happen on Tumblr and a number of us like to talk about topics.
To me going forward is in certain respects going backwards in time to those interests that remain and those in real life limitations that mean I require the support and supervision more of that child, getting those needs met.
It involves too learning new skills and exploring more of the world around me so I make the most of those innate abilities I have, being as independent as I can to make the most of my life.
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