That Uniformed Schoolboy on Tumblr week 3rd year

Following on a little from last weeks post we move into what is and would of been the the third anniversary of being on Tumblr continuously had it not been for losing the original accounts this time last year.

Much has changed since that period although the evidence of and the working through the various things that had left me feeling insecure in myself and questioning really who I was have needless to say gone from that site.

Part of that also came the original short lived ASB site  which took me back to all male environment socially where I soon found myself as little different than any or all of them  each being their individual selves with their own interests as indeed I always was being connected to part of the pattern of boyish masculinity others had and I critically had experienced too but had not associated with my gender.

I began to understand that really what made me was my own interests, passions and quirks that I bought to being that boy needing no other label or anything connected with the social world of females because what I had innately was all I needed and that was unquestionably my own identity.

In a sea of females I was happy. content and stable to be a male no more and no less and to be one of boys socially, very comfortable spending more time both in real life and online with males.

I also began to understand that I was rather less an age regressor  so much as a person with Age Dysphoria being very much in the mindset of and having similar needs to that of someone younger - a boy who in reality was hardly a day older than ten - on a permanent basis.

The varying degrees over the years that I engaged with that though play, interests and through just being happy to dress as I did back then seeing the boy I am took away many of the tensions in trying to just be myself.

Through lockdown I embraced myself, working with my boyishness making a life in conditions that were hard for all and coming out feeling more confident and stable  as that eternal little boy in his uniform who loved himself.

The greatest prize three years on is knowing yourself and having the confidence to move on in life as just you.